ode to 2005

This is an Asher tradition.

2003 is written somewhere in a notebook, and in 2004 I went digital.

My Ode to 2004

Now, 2005

Dear 2005,

It's hard to be the follow up act. Nothing can top 2004 in any respect, but I think you've done pretty well at just getting back on track. You came in at the first New Years that hasn't sucked in a long time, so I knew from then on it wouldn't be a terrible, but still not great year. And that's what you were. Just, a year.

A Year to learn from is what you were. During you I grew and feel at the top of my game right now. You took me the far reaches of Europe, to the concentration camps, to the cemetaries, to the ancient Greeks, to houses of kings and queens and Mozart, to the house of Thomas and Onica and Oma and Opa, to the streets of Venice (sorta), to fine art and not so fine art; the most ugly places on this earth and some of the most beautiful.

You've played a hard game of poker there, 2005. The swings have been brutal, but just like any fish, I got the better of you in the end. No one can win relying on luck an entire game, it just doesn't happen. Eventually skill will beat out luck, and I've been putting on a show down the stretch. Compare my poker game to the beginning of the year. I'm more patient-aggressive. Picking my spots better. Making my moves. All improving.

2005, you were a stepping stone year. I had to jump off of 2004 on to you, and it was a burden for you I'm sure. But now I jump off 2005 and in to 2006. With a chip lead and a run of good cards.

Sincerely yours,

Asher

I'm all in...dark

Ok, so just some stories from possibly the best poker run of my life, all this week

Monday night -- Alex busts me out with 35 vs my 77 in a small tourny, then we play a cash game and I rake in +30, 20 from Alex on a better 2 pair. So I'm +25.

Tuesday -- 20 Dollar 20 person tourny. 5th overall. Played impecable. At one point I am chip leader with 4,000. I lose with trips to a flopped flush, no way to tell, my stack drops to 1,500. I have 1,500 7 handed, top 4 place. Next hand someone with 1,000 in chips knocks out the smaller 2 stacks, raking in to 2,000. So now I'm small stack with 5 people left, bubble boy. Then it was all 93's and 85's to my eventual demise. Can't be upset, just annoyed. 5/20. 0 profit.

Wednesday -- 9 person tourny with rich jews. Basically play fine. 1 bad move. Then I'm going heads up with like 100 dollars up against 350. I lean on the guy and eventually pull it out. He wasn't any good anyway. 1st. +50.

Today (Friday) -- Biggest tourny of my life. 50 person at Jordan's. First some history. I'm known there for managing the small stack. Last summer I was in a tourny, another big one, and 9 handed I'm sitting with 10 in chips, blinds at 4/8. And I won the tourny. Anyway, flashforward to now. We all started with 10,000 in chips, and never at any point did I have more than 20,000. Lowest was to around 3,000 and then double ups to stay alive and very good timing led to getting to the final table. I went into the final table, 9, in the money and with 11,000 in chips, blinds at 1,000/2,000. Eventually people knock themselves out to get 8 handed. I have A5 of spades. Someone calls with A8. I flop the flush. I rule. Then 7 handed I move in with A7 and get called with AK. Jack flops it dramatically. First card -- 7. Everyone cheers! Next card -- K. Everyone cheers! Chaos. Next card -- 7! PANDEMONIUM. Oh boy that was the most thrilling moment of my life. Hang around a little longer till I run out of luck and lose a coinflip, but not till I place 5th and mount another incredible small stack-Asher story for the ages. 5th - +115.

That makes my week +170. Not too shabby.

Best Of List

New Format

Top Movies of the Year (10 only for now)
1. Brokeback Mountain
2. Capote
3. Munich
4. Good Night and Good Luck
5. Match Point
6. Gunnar Palace
7. Old Boy
8. Squid and the Whale
9. Grizzly Man
10. King Kong

Top WORST Movies of the year
1. Elizabethtown - probably one of the biggest debacles ever
2. Flightplan - nothing good about this at all
3. Crash - I will murder Paul Haggis, I think I'll roundhouse kick him
4. Broken Flowers/Thumbsucker/Junebug - I didn't see Junebug but these were the worst "indie" movies ever
5. War of the Worlds - Independance Day > Tom Cruise
6. Ice Harvest - Sorry John
7. Walk the Line - Um...no...terrible theme, terrible pacing, good music.

Top Next Moments :

1. Lesbian Girl : "My name is Courtney and I love big boobs"

2. Guy : So have you ever been in a serious relationship?
Girl : Yeah...
Guy : So did you lose your virginity to him?
Girl : No, actually, I'm still a virgin...
Guy : Oh...um...next

3. Guy who was obviously gay and nexted a girl because she wanted to cook for him, then nexted a girl because her boobs were too big, and then took a girl that liked to read poetry with him

4. Girl : So you don't like party or anything?
Guy : Well I do, but there's more to life, right?
Girl : Yeah, I guess
Guy : Don't you do anything other than party?
Girl : Well, yeah
Guy : Don't you have any ambitions or passions for life?
Girl : One thing I do like doing is having good conversation, so next
Guy : Well maybe in the future you should focus less on partying and more on having a personality

5. Scooby : I hope this girl likes treats cause maybe she'll get a taste of my Scooby snacks

movie update, with new list *EDIT*

Top Movies of the Year
1. Brokeback Mountain
2. Capote
3. Munich
4. Good Night and Good Luck
5. Match Point
6. Gunnar Palace
7. Old Boy
8. Squid and the Whale
9. Grizzly Man
10. King Kong
11. Constantine
12. Weatherman
13. Syriana
14. Me, You and Everyone we Know
15. Shop Girl
16. Jarhead
17. Three Extremes
18. Rent
18. 40 Year Old Virgin
20. Batman Begins
21. Wedding Crashers

Top WORST Movies of the year
1. Elizabethtown - probably one of the biggest debacles ever
2. Flightplan - nothing good about this at all
3. Crash - I will murder Paul Haggis, I think I'll roundhouse kick him
4. Broken Flowers/Thumbsucker/Junebug - I didn't see Junebug but these were the worst "indie" movies ever
5. Sin City - Um, trailer > movie, nuf said
6. War of the Worlds - Independance Day > Tom Cruise
7. Ice Harvest - Sorry John
8. Walk the Line - Um...no...terrible theme, terrible pacing, good music.


More to follow when I think of more

movie update revision

Rethought, haven't seen anything new

1. Brokeback Mountain
2. Good Night Good Luck
3. Capote
4. Gunnar Palace
5. Match Point (if I think what I think)
6. Old Boy
7. Squid and the Whale
8. Grizzly Man
9. Constantine
10. Weatherman
11.Syriana
12. Me, You and Everyone we Know
13. Shop Girl
14. Jarhead
15. Three Extremes
16. Rent
17. 40 Year Old Virgin
18. Batman Begins



Squid and Grizzly moved up, and Extremes dropped

Merry Xmas

NEXT

I decided to list my favorite Next's because it's the best show ever and I just saw a top 5 performance

1. Guy : So have you ever been in a serious relationship?
Girl : Yeah...
Guy : So did you lose your virginity to him?
Girl : No, actually, I'm still a virgin...
Guy : Oh...um...next

2. Guy who was obviously gay and nexted a girl because she wanted to cook for him, then nexted a girl because her boobs were too big, and then took a girl that liked to read poetry with him

3. Girl : So you don't like party or anything?
Guy : Well I do, but there's more to life, right?
Girl : Yeah, I guess
Guy : Don't you do anything other than party?
Girl : Well, yeah
Guy : Don't you have any ambitions or passions for life?
Girl : One thing I do like doing is having good conversation, so next
Guy : Well maybe in the future you should focus less on partying and more on having a personality

4. Scooby : I hope this girl likes treats cause maybe she'll get a taste of my Scooby snacks

movie update

1. Brokeback Mountain
2. Good Night Good Luck
3. Capote
4. Gunnar Palace
5. Match Point (if I think what I think)
6. Old Boy
7. Syriana
8. Squid and the Whale
9. Grizzly Man
10. Weatherman
11. Three Extremes
12. Jarhead
13. Shop Girl
14. Me, You and Everyone we Know
15. Rent


Also, Emily Mortimer said she loved me.

Ahem

Me : I love you!
Emily (in car driving away) : I love you too!

I rule

My list is subject to change, as many of those movies are still running through my head

hows about a real blog post

these are in no particular order



-- snow on my car!




-- thats video game michael vick soaring through the air...literally




-- just from the weezer concert, i love that picture





-- snow in md




-- plant(e) = kisses




-- this is sam in a dress from a while ago, he's pretty




-- this is jonah's turkey




-- more plant(e) jokes




-- brandon looking confused at his steak




-- this is an all time favorite, mexicans pushing a car up the street...hehe




-- jonah and his turkey



hows about a poker metaphor for life? cause thats all life is.

So im in a heads up tourny, low stacked, i get A2 i go all in. he has A8. i have black cards, the 2 of clubs. flop is xx2, two clubs. im like, yay. turn the 8 of clubs. im like aw. river my fifth club. so i double up and eventually win.

i dont think ive won the hand yet, im definently still stuck in the turn waiting for my miracle club, or 2 for that matter. well see if i can suck out and win.

music quiz ala em

I stole this from Emilie.

"Go to the music player of your choice and put it on shuffle. Say the following questions aloud and press play. Use the song titles as your answers. NO CHEATING!"

How does the world see me?
Song: Cells
Artist: The Servant (The main theme from Sin City)

So I'm just here to serve? Or to be cool theme music?

Will I have a happy life?
Song: Three Types of People
Artist: Team America Soundtrack (the dicks, pussies, assholes monoloug)

Which am I, a dick, pussy or asshole? Hmm.


What do my friends really think of me?
Song: Automatic
Artist: Less Than Jake

"I think, I think I know it all". Lyrics. Interesting.


Do people secretly lust after me?
Song: "No one Else"
Artist: Weezer

People that don't laugh for anyone but me, I guess


How can i make myself happy?
Song: Range Life
Artist: Pavement

Looks like the range life is for me, goodbye city hello horses.


What should i do with my life?
Song: Paper Tiger
Artist: Spoon

Oragami? goodbye city, hello China


Why should life be full of so much pain?
Song: Feelin Groovy
Artist: Paul and Art

There's no pain, just groovyness...kicking down the cobblestones


How can i maximize my pleasure during sex?
Song: Are We the Waiting
Artist: Green Day

I guess...wait? I'm not sure how I want to interpret this one...


Will I ever have children?
Song: The Sound of Silence
Artist: Art and Paul again

Well thats just depressing


Will I die happy?
Song: Ren and Stimpy Theme Song
Artist: Ren and Stimpy yo

If I die listening to this song, then yes


What is some good advice for me?
Song: Everybody Hurts
Artist: REM

Well thanks for being uplifting REM


What is happiness?
Song: My Poor Brain
Artist: Foo Fighters

Makes sense I suppose. I like my brain


What is my favorite fetish?
Song: Put Yo Hands Where my Eyes can see
Artist: Busta Rhymes

Hands I suppose. I do like hands.

How will i be remembered?
Song: Some things will never change
Artist: Meat Puppets

Someone who never changes? I'll take that

That was fun. Thank you Em

movie update

1. Brokeback Mountain
2. Good Night Good Luck
3. Capote
4. Gunnar Palace
5. Weatherman
6. Old Boy
7. Squid and the Whale
8. Three Extremes
9. Me, You and Everyone We Know
10. Rent
11. Jarhead
12. 40 Year Old Virgin
13. Wedding Crashers
14. Batman Begins

Reserving spots for : Syriana, Breakfast on Pluto, Walk the Line, Munich, Match Point

My Weekend

13 or so hours into killing Los Illuminodos and saving a whiny little bitch of a president's daughter.

Word

fun with tamir

movieman2g (12:10:43 PM): go to school
trules942 (12:10:51 PM): go to thell
movieman2g (12:10:57 PM): where is thell
trules942 (12:11:03 PM): its the layer below hell
movieman2g (12:11:13 PM): is it nice down there
trules942 (12:11:21 PM): ive heard stories
trules942 (12:11:26 PM): less satanic
movieman2g (12:11:27 PM): youve never been?
trules942 (12:11:30 PM): na
movieman2g (12:11:33 PM): i hear its a nice vacation spot
trules942 (12:11:34 PM): ive heard its hotter though
movieman2g (12:11:40 PM): packaged with bura bura
trules942 (12:11:42 PM): yeah if you are looking for a nice black tan
trules942 (12:11:50 PM): ever hate being white?
movieman2g (12:11:52 PM): but i dont like black people
trules942 (12:11:53 PM): go to thell
trules942 (12:12:09 PM): its filled with a bunch of white people who worship rap music
movieman2g (12:12:20 PM): shudder
trules942 (12:12:40 PM): for shizzle

trules942 (12:14:17 PM): wonderful i love sounding like a racist
movieman2g (12:16:29 PM): well
movieman2g (12:16:30 PM): yeah
movieman2g (12:16:39 PM): but who likes white people anyway
trules942 (12:16:45 PM): i sure dont
movieman2g (12:16:57 PM): what have white people ever done for us
trules942 (12:17:07 PM): i dunno
trules942 (12:17:12 PM): lets make a new race
trules942 (12:17:17 PM): called jewhites
movieman2g (12:17:31 PM): thats the greatist idea ever
movieman2g (12:17:33 PM): jewhites
movieman2g (12:17:42 PM): jews that dont want to associate with being white
movieman2g (12:17:58 PM): we dont oppress races of people, we dont want to be associated with those savages
movieman2g (12:18:06 PM): we also dont want to be associated with the white man dnace
movieman2g (12:18:10 PM): we jews have our own jew dance
trules942 (12:18:15 PM): thats right
trules942 (12:18:18 PM): hence the name
movieman2g (12:18:23 PM): exactly
movieman2g (12:19:32 PM): damn whitey
movieman2g (12:19:37 PM): yay jewhey
trules942 (12:20:25 PM): word
movieman2g (12:21:05 PM): how do you say word in hebrew
trules942 (12:21:10 PM): milah
movieman2g (12:21:13 PM): milah
trules942 (12:21:38 PM): MILAH MOTHA FUCKA

There we go

new feature on asher's blog

Here is a new feature for my blog.

Awesomest Person of the Week (or so) :

Completely stolen from Alex, but I'm doing it blog style, not AIM profile style. Eat me.

This week's awesomest person of the week is Amanda for bringing me 2 pies. And being awesome. But that's a given, I already knew Amanda was awesome, but the homemade blueberry pie and apple pie and dozens of cookies sealed the deal.



[EDIT:

I feel it necessary to point out a couple more awesome people. Amanda made my pie, but I feel an honorable mention should be put out there for Larke, she knows why. And a runner up award goes to Tamir for seeing Cream and me and getting good Chinese food in a literal hole in the ground. That is all

End EDIT]


In other news, Saw II, movie of the century? Discuss....

movie update

1. Brokeback Mountain
2. Good Night Good Luck
3. Three...Extremes (wow, just wow)
4. Weatherman
5. Old Boy
6. Capote
7. Gunnar Palace
8. Squid and the Whale
9. Me, You and Everyone We Know

movie update

Best movies of the year :

Brokeback Mountain
Good Night, Good Luck
Weatherman
Oldboy
Capote
Gunnar Palace
Me, You and Everyone We Know

I'll keep updating the list as I think of movies and see movies

"I wish I had two dicks"

First off, I would like to preface that I have no reason to post this post, other than to please those that read this blog. so for the few, enjoy

I had a great day the other day and it has continued, and I don't know why. I can tell you that it was because I met Oliver Stone and he completely blew me away and added insight into the world around us I didn't think of. I could tell you it was because I got tickets to see Weatherman (which was amazing), will see Gay Cowboys tomorrow (even though it will not be amazing) and will see Jarhead this weekend, along with Nightmare Before Xmas. I can tell you about the 200+ dollars I've made in online poker the past 2 weeks. I can tell you about how Tamir showed up at my door step at 11:30 PM last night and we ate in a literal hole in the ground and he's my favorite person in the world. I can tell you about how my screenplay is getting better footing in my head and I'm working on something I like for FSA and even for Con West. All these things I can tell you, but they are not the reason I'm in a good mood. I woke up on Monday after a decent weekend (nothing bad, but nothing life changing, aside from kickball) and was just in a good mood.

I will keep you updated. This fascinates me too.

Best movies so far --

Good Night, Good Luck
Weatherman (most enjoyable)
Gunnar Palace
Oldboy (did we decide this counts or what)

[Edit]
The Indie Boom had some good ones - Me, You and Everyone We Know, and on the same token some really awful ones - Broken Flowers.

attempt at foozer videos

Best Columbus Day Ever

Here are Foozer pictures. Best concert ever? Yes. YES. I'm trying to figure out how to upload the video I took on here.

Best Thursday Ever

I may or may not add caption to these pictures later on. Just know it kicked ass.