Poker Update

Since Danny Feuer is a little bitch, I'm going to update. And also since I've had one of the most frustrating hour of online poker in my life, I'm going to rant here for a while.

First of all, there was a hand I wanted to post entitled, "Hey my luck is turning around." This was a long time ago. The hand in essence was this :

I'm on the button with about 800 in chips, blinds 50/100 and I get a black 88. UTG pushes all in for around 260, next to act calls, then a fold then a call then a fold to me. I push HOPING to isolate to just a coin flip, but get called by both other players. Flop comes Kxx and I'm getting ready to leave, then a 9 then an A. I'm just about to leave when everyone mucks to me. I check the hand history and I see I was up against Q10 (SB), 66 and 33.

So that hand was coming off of 3 losing tournements and 1 bubble, all to terrible beats and terrible runs (like flopping top pair of J on a dry board with KJ and facing AJ, that sort of shit).

So then I'm in these 2 tournements, and I'm chip leader in both. I got a little lucky hitting a set in each and battled to just take the chip lead. And then...DISCONNECTED. Hmm. I run upstairs, reboot. Still nothing. Then I call comcast. 20 minutes later I get running...sort of. It connects, and then disconnects, so I try and process again. For those of you who have never been disconnected while in a tournement, imagine the Incredible Hulk beating up a...something. I almost beat up my kitten who I'm pretty sure disconnected me one time.

So I finally get back to my tournements to find I obviously lost my chip lead and am obviously in last place in both. In one, first hand I see reconnected is KJ, I have to push cause I have like 2 BBs, and I get called by QQ of course. Then in the other, I steal some blinds and 2 hands later I push with A8, get called with T7, flop by A and then turn T river 7. And here I am. One of my worst online sessions in weeks.

BUT -- As I said to Feuer before playing, I was trying to get all my bad beats out of the way tonight before tomorrow's big tourny in CP. so hopefully I did that. Got all my Naq's in.

Let me explain what a Naq is now.

The other night, I guess Sunday night, I make some calls and get a game. James, Hamburger, Feuer, Neil and Country, and country says he's bringing a couple guys. So he shows up with 2 guys, stoned off their asses, Losh and Naq. We sit down, ready for a normal night of poker. I even made the stakes more reasonable to .25/.25 as opposed to the .25/.50 with our buy ins of 20 dollars. It just makes more sense until we up the stakes.

First big hand, Neil and Martin are all in on the flop, flop of 3H 8D 10D, Neil shows A3 of diamonds and Martin shows QJ of diamonds. So Neil was winning to a QJ or 9...or the river 9 of diamonds, giving Martin the straight flush. That was to set the mood.

Next nice hand, which will go down in history. Naq, new guy who no one really knows is the dealer. Puts me in straddle position, so I straddle to 1 dollar. Martin RE-straddles to 2.50. Neil OPENS to 6. James calls on the cut off and Naq calls on the button. Flop K 4 5. Neil checks, James bets around 10 and Naq pushes all in, for about another 8 or so. Neil folds what I think was like AQ or weaker, James shows 55 (a set of 5's) and Naq turns over 3 4. That's right, he CALLS an all in with bottom pair. So turn an A. River, of course, the 2. So Naq pulls out what I believe to be a .03% win.

VERY next hand : After we all sort of mutter to ourselves about Naq maybe cheating, I mean, come on that's a whacky hand, James pushes his like 9 dollars remaining with TT and Naq calls with 56. Eventually Naq hits his inside straight, again. And we realize Naq isn't cheating, he just was the luckiest man alive.

The rest of the night was more of the same. Money flying around the table, 60 dollar pots being won with middle pots, raises on outside straight draws and bottom pairs. Eventually, I ran out of chips. We had to play with cash on the table. So at one point, I had 40 dollars in cash and 50 dollars in chips in front of me. It was a great feeling. Martin scored big cashing out around 170, James had a respectable 60 eventually I had around 100 and Naq had 0 in chips by the end of it.

It was a night to remember. And now we have a new term. A Naq is pulling a 1 outer. Or making the wrong move and somehow getting lucky enough to seem like you know what you're doing.

Well, I'm going to go fall asleep while the USPC is on in the background.

I better have some better luck tomorrow. For realz.

Oh, and in 10 or so business days, my jerseys will be here and I will be officially, Good Bet Ash.

Word